This Is The Kind Of Fuckboy A Guy Will Be, According To His ‘Love Language’
1. Quality Time
It’s frighteningly easy to be blinded
by the ways of a fuckboy who sincerely craves quality time. He’ll invite
you over to hang out so you can actually watch Netflix and chill for a
while before he makes a move. When you wake up lying beside him after
spending the night, he’ll encourage you to stick around for coffee and
breakfast. Naturally, you’ll interpret these invitations to linger as
evidence that he’s interested. It’ll be tough to see his overtures as
misleading because he genuinely wants you around. But the fact is that a
QT fuckboy doesn’t really care who’s actually there. Yes, he craves
your company, but only so much as he craves the next girl’s.
2. Physical Touch
The fuckboy whose love language is physical touch will win you over with masterful expressions of affection. He will take every opportunity to touch you, ever so tenderly, on the shoulder or the upper leg or the small of your back. He will hold your hand tightly whenever he can, and cradle your face gently between his palms as he kisses you in a way that tastes of long-term commitment and everlasting fidelity. He might offer you a massage before bed, or as soon as you wake up. And he will cuddle you all night long. But you are merely a body to him—a pawn in his plan to get what he needs from a fellow human’s physique. In group settings, you’ll see how flirtatious he is with so many others, touching them shamelessly as he touches you, right before your eyes.
3. Words of Affirmation
Flattery can be more effective than any
other tactic in winning someone over and the fuckboy whose love
language is words of affirmation knows this. He traffics in compliments,
dishing them out to woman after woman night after night. An expert at
identifying just what a person wants to hear, he’ll ask you the right
questions and shower you with seemingly thoughtful positive comments. In
praising people, he’s not afraid to get specific or dramatic—about how
stunning you look, how remarkably unique every aspect of your
personality is, or how startlingly brilliant you are. A quintessential
ass-kisser, he will talk his way into making you think he’s your
certified soulmate.
4. Receiving Gifts
If he’s set on sleeping with you, the fuckboy fluent in receiving gifts will show up at your doorstep clutching a giant bouquet of flowers, irresistible old school gentleman style, or a first edition copy of your favorite book. How could you not be totally impressed? He might even surprise you at the beginning of class with a small but quasi-meaningful trinket, or pop by your place of work at lunchtime with your favorite sandwich. He knows how to make an entrance, and you’ll marvel at his generosity. But as soon as he gets what he wants, the presents will suddenly stop because he’s way too busy gifting his next target.5. Acts of Service
The fuckboy whose love language is acts of service has a sixth sense for figuring out how to make himself useful. His aim is to get in your pants by easing your daily burden however he can. Sensing when you’re stressed or tired, he’ll offer to help you out in a way that makes you instantly grateful, whether that means running across campus to drop off your paper so you can nap, taking out the garbage, or finishing a load of laundry so you can go to the gym. He’ll run errands for you without ever being asked to. Any outsider looking in would mistake this behavior as the work of a man who’s husband material, but this fuckboy has no intention of sticking around. He’ll be doing another woman’s dishes in no time.
This Is The Kind Of Fuckboy A Guy Will Be, According To His ‘Love Language’
Reviewed by David Stevens
on
1:35 PM
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